Return to Sender (Please?)

Often times, it is said by young earth creationists that you can tell a watch is made by a designer, it has a clear purpose. It tells time, with mechanisms made for the purpose. They apply this to humans, too. That we are designed, have a purpose, have mechanisms that are designed to keep us alive. Let’s compare a human to a watch, then.

The human appendix does not serve a valuable function (, yet it can explode, burst, or otherwise kill the human it exists in. This would be akin to a hand on the watch that serves no purpose, but occasionally jams the other hands on the watch.
The human eye is backwards in function, and has a blind spot ( This would be akin to the watch band being put upside down so the face is against your skin. Not only that, but part of the face is opaque, so you can’t see what time it is if the hands are there. You can guess, and be close, just like the blind spot, but you won’t know until the hands aren’t there any more.

Now, you might say, God created us in his image. Let’s ignore the fact that this implies God is flawed, and move on. Why did he give us broken eyes? Installed backwards, upside down, with blind spots? You might think, we have the best eyes there can be… But you’d be wrong, and I can prove that.

The cephalopod eye ( has no blind spot. Why didn’t God give me an eye with no blind spot? That can see under water? In the dark? Why did he give the best eyes to squids?

I could go on for next to infinity, but I’ll stop here. So what would you do if you found a watch with a blind spot, upside down, with a hand that does nothing but get in the way of the other hands? You’d return that watch, because it is awful.

So where do I go to return my broken body? My terribly designed body? Why won’t the watch maker give me a refund, or a working watch? You suck, watch maker. You suck so much.

If there was no watch maker, there is no vendor to return to… And that is why I feel the watch maker is absent my life.

Have a great day, and sorry to have made your day a little worse.

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